Snap Happy

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I can’t remember where, but I saw a prompt which wanted me to write stream-of-consciousness style for twenty minutes, so I did, and this is it, and I have linked it to the prompt. #1 daughter actually does name her computer folders like the lass in this tale and I have no idea how she ever finds anything *grin*

What have I done with it? It has to be here somewhere. Why did I get so drunk? I’d never have saved the stupid thing if I’d been sober! Oh hell, what if I dumped it into one of Shelley’s folders? She’s my sister and I love her dearly, but sharing a computer was never a good idea. Why did I agree to it? Is it possible to drop something into a folder that’s not yours? Why don’t I know more about computers? Why did I let him buy me so many cocktails? Breath!

Ok, maybe I put it in a relevant folder. Alphabetical? Who knows? I was too busy giggling and trying not to hurl, by turns. What the…? Why do I name my folders things like ‘wnaholnjioi328’ and ‘stuff’? Geez Louise, am I really that lazy? I wonder what’s in them? Oh gods… that picture is so old. Why did I think a Purdey cut would look good on my chubby face? Ra-Ra skirts! I don’t even remember putting these files on here! Maybe I didn’t, Shelley might have. What’s in here?

Urgh, ancient uni work and random scribblings from my emo teen stage. Where the hell did I put the stupid upload? Wait perhaps I didn’t. Upload it I mean. Maybe it’s still on my phone… Of course not, couldn’t be that simple huh? Think, think, think! Try to go over what you did when you got in. Oh who am I kiddin’? I can’t remember anything after falling up the front steps and head-butting the doorbell. Oh no, who let me in? Please let it have been Shelley!

Shelley? Did you let me in last night? You did? Well thank fu… Did you stay with me? Yes, yes I was exceedingly drunk. No, I don’t remember talking about the merits of Sam’s manhood or the peculiar mole on it. Shelley… Shelley! Stop laughing and help me! Did I upload anything to the computer when I got in? Why would I want to look at Facebook? Oh no….

That obnoxious bast… How dare he? He even tagged me! Lord, take me now! Just open up the ground and drop me in, I’m begging you. My arse looks enormous bent over like that and why the hell did I wear a thong? With that skirt? What kind of boyfriend takes your photo when you’re barfing in the gutter and then posts it for the world to see?

Well what d’ya know. Look Shelley, I found the picture I uploaded from my phone last night. I think I’ll pop it on Instagram, Facebook, Reddit, hell, even Google+ as I sure some saddo has no life there and will enjoy the image. You know, Shelley, you are quite right; Sam’s peculiar mole will definitely get more attention than my thong…

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